That’s not true. I mean, that picture is totally doctored, and is that a girl? I can’t even tell. I had better hair. I know that. So, the news has been leaking out. It is my birthday today. In lieu of gifts please make a donation to the Human Fund. But, seriously, it’s no big deal. We should all be thankful for this day, though, because if I wasn’t around you’d only have 83 websites in your time-wasting rotation instead of 84. You’d be that much more in tune with celebrity gossip. So, you’re welcome.
I don’t have a story to tell, an anecdote today. We should probably just realize that a great man was born today. A man who once led the undefeated T-Ball Mohawks to the World Championship of Malvern, PA with a 1.000 batting average (that’s not a typo). A man, who once won a slam dunk contest against himself (on an 8 foot rim). A man who once mastered the game NES Open to the point where no one before or since will ever touch his prowess. A man who came up with the idea of Spicy Chicken Nuggets, and the condiment revolver. A man who was recently named one of the top 2,000 golfers in the history of Rabbit Run Road. And, of course the man who writes this blog that has captivated you so. The anecdote that is this man’s life? Well, it’d just would be too hard to believe.
What are the plans for the big day? Well, lets just say I may be at Chuck E. Cheese’s around 7 pm if anyone wants to stop by. I’ll be the guy hustling six year olds on the skee ball courts. Yeah, I called them courts. I own them sh*ts. Of course in reality I will be at Chuck E. Cheese, but only because I moonlight as Chuckie. Times are tough.
If I make it through this intense night at “The Cheese”, I’ll have a big weekend schedule locked up. I mean, Pearl Jam is closing down the Philadelphia Spectrum on Saturday Night. This has music nerds all atwitter. “I heard they’re playing till dawn.” “I heard they’re playing every song on every album in reverse order”. I’m sorry, I just love concert nerds. Can’t wait to hear the set-list, and how sick it was. It is a shame the Spectrum goes down. Great building. Especially for a hockey game.
The Phillies announced they’re going Joe Blanton for game 4 of the World Series. This disappoints about 46,000 Philly fans who had tickets for game four and were hoping for Cliff Lee (count the blogger among them). But, you know how that Turtle looking M’F'er rolls in the Series. He picks up wins, and rips homers. Should be gravy. All I think it does it crank up the pressure on Cole a little more for tomorrow. Seriously Cole, cute Comcast commercial. Now, put your dog in its little Louis handbag, toss it over your shoulder, and get to the park. You have a game to win.
I was going to send out a rally cry for David Duval this weekend. He’s 125th on the Money List, and that’s the last spot that gets full status for next year. The Tour is somewhere down in Mississippi where its been raining since Labor Day. First Round pushed back until Saturday. Come on Davey. Make that cut, we want to see your wild ass on Tour in 2010.
Happy Halloween everyone, send me pics of yourselves in costume. I’ll blog the horsebleep out of you. I hope you get good candy too. Like all snickers, milky ways and twix. Maybe some M&Ms. I’m sure you know all the good houses by now. Have a good one….Go Phils.