On Uniforms.

Maryland at the Whim of Under Armour.

Drink that in, Oregon.  I don’t know what to make of this Maryland uni.  It’s almost universally being crowned as the ugliest uniform of all-time, but that’s obviously hyperbole.  The 70s happened, people, and things like the Chicago White Sox wearing shorts can’t just be erased off the books because Maryland trotted out a new helmet.

Collar From Arnold Palmer Golf.

I don’t really have a problem with any of the new uniforms, although my general rule would be: Any time you are approaching an ensemble that looks like it could have been in Any Given Sunday, it’s time to take a step back.  My biggest problem is some of these schools have 6, 8, or even more combinations that they can wear.  They’re becoming showpieces for the apparel companies, which seems like a shocking bit of hypocrisy even for the NCAA.  There was an article at Grantland last week titled, How Does Oregon do It?  Or something like that, I didn’t read it, but the blurb under the headline asked how Oregon stays competitive.  Well, I think the avalanche of money Nike drops on the school helps a bit, and obviously the other companies like Under Armour aren’t going to sit back and let that happen so they hook up with Maryland and the players find a new way to get exploited while the coaches get rich.  It’s a beautiful system.

Enough about the NCAA and trendy helmets, though.  What are the best uniforms out there?  There is some significance to a team’s colors and jerseys.  I mean, even if I was a die-hard Sixers fan, there’s no way I ever would have bought anything with this logo on it.

Awful.

And, I feel the same way about the Phillies day game jersey.  That cream-colored atrocity and awful blue hat.  I must be in the minority here, because I see tons of those jerseys every time I go to a Phillies game, but I just don’t see it.  It’s not a strong look.  If I was rating the uniforms of the Philadelphia teams, I’d probably go:

  1. Flyers
  2. Sixers
  3. Phillies
  4. Eagles

My thought process is, the Flyers may have that odd logo, but it is unmistakable and original.  They also have orange and black, which I think is a strong combination, and they’ve never really buckled and tried to do anything modern, or given up on their roots for some generic red/blue/gray scheme.  The Sixers have always had pretty solid uniforms except for the A.I. era.  We’re just going on what they’re wearing right now, though, and the Sixers look pretty minimalist and sharp. The Phils are all right, but they don’t have any claim to the color red or the pinstripe, so it’s all a bit derivative, and honestly the Phillies font is not my favorite.  The Eagles, of course, wear midnight green, and there is no excuse to be made for that.  It’s hideous.

It’s funny that I think most people would probably say they prefer the Eagles throwback uniforms.  The kelly green.  And, people might even go further to say that they liked the uniforms across the board in the 60s compared to what we have now.  I’m not sure if that is just a testament to how bad the modern uniforms are, or if the old uniforms just trigger nostalgia in people.  I don’t remember ever being really high on kelly green, but every year when the Eagles put it on, I fall in love and have visions of Randall Cunningham.   I’d imagine it’s the same with the Chargers’ powder blues, or the Pat the Patriot uniforms.  Was anyone sitting around in 1985 saying, dang, those Pats uniforms are hot!  I don’t think so.

Anyway, here’s some other uniforms I’m a fan of:

  1. Cleveland Browns–No Logo is pretty gutsy.
  2. St. Louis Cardinals–Timeless
  3. Chicago Blackhawks–Best of the classic NHL Logos
  4. Boston Celtics–Is it me, or are most NBA uniforms awful?
  5. New York Yankees–The only team I can say will never change?
  6. Oakland Raiders–Silver and Black

***

Quiz of the Day Returns: Guess that Batting Average.  Category: Baseball History/Test Taking Skills.  My Score: 28/50.

 

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15 thoughts on “On Uniforms.

  1. Favorite unis in no order

    1. Browns
    2. Bears
    3. Colts
    4. Blackhawks
    5. Red Wings
    6. Bruins
    7. A’s
    8. Yankees
    9. Red Sox
    10. Dodgers

    I can’t think of basketball uniform I really like right now. There are some good ones, but nothing that really draws me in.

    Uniform I wish were back:
    1. Denver (orange crush)
    2. Eagles (kelly green)
    3. Mighty Ducks (Disney style)
    4. Tampa Bay (do I even know which ones to say?)

    Okay, so I’m dork. I like uniforms and yes, I still wear a football jersey from time to time.

  2. those have to be fake right?

    or just mock ups.

    there are some real bad ones there. most notably, New England, but a couple look all right. Oakland, SF. The one’s they didn’t put a weird graphic on.

    Maybe it’s for real, gotta sell more jerseys. It’s like Drivers. Oh, this year’s is TOTALLY better. (cough, cough)

  3. The Grantland piece on Oregon and Phil Knight was really interesting to read. Knight is totally manipulating high school athletes to want to play football at Oregon.

    As for UMD unis… yikes. Those need a lot of help, but then again has Under Armour ever been known for creating a good look.

    ESPN blog post analyzing baseball uniforms that was pretty interesting to read:http://espn.go.com/blog/sweetspot/post/_/id/14629/get-uniforms-right-and-be-who-you-are

  4. yeah, i’ll have to check out that article eventually. .

    I guess what Nike does is no more shady than someone like T. Boone Pickens completely taking over OK St’s athletics, but I guess it just feels more sinister since Nike is in the sports business. OK ST football isn’t out on the field selling oil.

  5. Great call on the 3rd Phillies jerseys. they are hideous and yet you see them all over the park. They are missing the boat among this era of greatness to release a really sweet 3rd jersey. I hope it happens soon.

    Other great NHL jerseys for my money:
    Coyotes (while they still have a team) and the Lightning 3rd jerseys with “BOLTS” written across them. The Flyers winter classic jerseys are pretty nice as well – they are a remake of the only other pro hockey team in phillly that lasted all of 1 year (The Quakers): http://www.nfl-bing.com/views/Philadelphia-Flyers–27-Talbot-2012-Winter-Classic-Orange-Jersey-96883.html

    On that site you can also buy illegal jerseys straight from the sweat shops of China. Don’t tell them I sent ya…

  6. Yeah Luke McCown. No relation to Cade.

    Obviously saving 9 million is the most important thing for the Jags.

    Tank another season, get Gabbert some help.

  7. i get a very milli vanilly (in one) vibe from these uniforms.
    who allowed this?

    but didnt they play well in them, which points out that a lil ugly can go a long way…even score.

    Q

  8. Basketball i still like the simple old knicks jerseys.

    Is Nike any more sinister than using pro athlete alumni to recruit for schools? Like the way all the Miami guys used to come back and what not?

  9. well, yeah, I think Nike is worse than a single alumni, but I know what you are saying.

    I guess with Nike their benefit just seems more direct. The other boosters get the benefit of association, or it indirectly boosts their business, but with Nike, it’s right out there on the field.

    whatever, college football isn’t fixable.

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