Verdict is In.

Stuart Smalley > Bruno

Stuart Smalley > Bruno

I hate to say that I saw this coming, because when I first saw the preview for Bruno I definitely thought it was funny, but I was also feeling a red flag or two.  Well, I can safely say that Bruno is terrible.  Now, I haven’t seen it myself, but two loyal blog visitors have told me to stay away…and frankly, that is all I need to hear.  Tonight blog correspondent JCK with a special assist from Mrs. JCK called me to tell me to never see the movie.  They were saving me from paying to watch it.  That’s called taking a bullet.  That’s called being a good blog correspondent.  I could be mistaken, but I think I heard Mrs. JCK in the background say, “Bruno’s gayer than a Spring picnic.” 

Of course, we knew this coming in, but the danger of making a movie around one character is over-saturation.  And, while Borat toed the line, it appears that Bruno has gone over it.  Well over it, at least in many people’s minds.  This form of movie doesn’t always work.  See pretty much every SNL movie ever made.  I mean, Stuart Smalley wasn’t even a funny sketch, but some funny sketches ended up being terrible films.  It can happen.  Luckily for Sasha Baron Cohen he’s so famous that this movie will do 150+ million, and people will laugh just because they think they are supposed to. 

I aplogize for the lack of blogging today, but like MLB I am on the All-Star Break.  Played some golf with the pops today, and hit the ball well enough to not contemplate driving into a bridge abutment on the way home.  Last week I “actually”, “really” broke 80 as well…so maybe I’ll cancel the tennis lessons.  And by tennis I mean ping pong, and by ping pong I mean beer pong, and by beer pong I mean solitary drinking. 

After golf I checked out pop’s 2008 Phils World Series ring.  He just got his.  Totem pole issues I suppose….bastards, but anyway nice piece of hardware, and obviously there will be no pictures.  What do you think this is TMZ?   In actuality my dad made me look at the ring through bullet and photo proof glass.  And, in terms of blogging, hope to do a little better tomorrow, and then probably not so good Wednesday.  I need a bullpen. 

Just because A.I. used to be a Sixer, and he’s probably the last basketball player I’ll ever really like (LeBron ruined it this year against Orland-ho), I’m going to mention that Iverson is alledgedly in serious talks with the Clip Show.  This really is an appropriate end, is it not?

Tried to watch the Home Run Derby, oh did I try, but it’s still going on now I suppose, and I don’t care.  Without Josh Hamilton hitting 28 bombs, it just doesn’t seem that captivating.  If someone is hitting 2o bombs right now, I’m going to look like an idiot, but I think I’m all right.


Times and Lines.

British Heaven?

British Heaven?

Completely solved the weekly betting problem.  Welcome to Cheery Old England where they encourage you to bet on your favorite squad.  Football, cricket, whatever.  Just pop into the Ladbrokes, and drop a couple pounds.  Can you imagine the mayhem if you could bet on the Eagles at Wawa?  I’m an idea man.  So, if betting was so accessible, would you get bored with it?  The answer to that is, obviously not.  Some tee times and lines for the British:

Tiger’s teeing off at 4:09 AM on Thursday.  What?  Apparently England is a diffferent time zone.  Here I was thinking we went to Universal Eastern Standard Time.  Guess Not.  So, we’ll see Tiger on replay Thursday.  He’s playing with Japanese phenom Ryo Ishikawa, and Lee Westwood.  Nice pairing…Tiger is 2/1.  Pretty short odds for a buckler.  Westwood is 25/1, maybe worth a few pounds?  Ishikawa is 500/1.  Seems like very long odds for someone with his pedigree.

Some other bets I’d think about:

Rory McIlroy 25/1.  Playing with Anthony Kim and Retief at 8:30 on Thursday.  I don’t know why I like McIlroy.  It’s counterintuitive.  These Euro phenoms have never really panned out in this event either…maybe a top-5, but we’re picking winners here.  For some reason I think McIlroy is different, and may win a big one by 21 or so. 

Adam Scott 50/1.  Now, I’ve spent most of the year trashing Adam Scott, but he’s finally playing better.  These are some long odds for someone with his talents.  He’s not one of my favorites, but 50/1?  Maybe a floater.  He’s going off very early Thursday with Nick Dougherty and, that’s right…David Duval.  Duval checks in at 100/1.  What do you call that?  Respect.  Shorter odds than some big names…in London, they know what’s up.

Nick Watney 80/1.  If I was making one bet, this might be it.  I mean, how do you make money betting golf winners?  I don’t know, but Watney played well in Scotland last week, and has had a good year.  It’s 80/1.  Seems worth a shot.  Watney isn’t exactly in a feature pairing.  He’s going off with Graeme Storm and Charl Swartzel.  Under the radar.  That’s how I like it. 

Some Other Lines:

Paddy Harrington:  The two time defending champ is 25/1.

Martin Kaymer: The winner of the last two Euro events is 33/1.

Sean O’Hair:  Decent, albeit limited British record is 66/1.

John Daly:  250/1 for the former chap

Greg Norman:  Last’s year’s great story and the ’86 champ at Turnberry is 300/1.

And, last but not least there is a cat in the field named Steven Gross Jr.  Needless to say, love this guy’s chances, and from what I hear a real immaculate striker of the ball.  He’s going off at 1,500-1.  Candy from a baby.