It doesn’t look like anyone is going to get away in NFL Pick ‘Em. This is the ultimate horse race and it always rewards those with the best closing speed. We’ve trimmed about 10% off that gaudy 71 percent winners figure that was leading the race a few weeks back. That was probably unrealistic to maintain, especially when double-digit favorites are out there losing outright. If I was half the writer Rick Reilly was right now I’d say something like, “Talk about Mischief Night.” Anyway, Monday night has been a graveyard for favorites too. Big Dub has been weaving his way through the bye-weeks with the best results, but personally, I can’t wait for the full slates to kick back up.
NFL Pick ‘Em Standings:
- Big Dub: 23-14-3
- JCK: 23-16-1
- Kraft: 19-17-4
- Grossy: 20-18-2
- Nichols: 16-22-2
The “Is That a King Size Milky Way,” Pick of the Week: I had the faith in the home team, but picking against the Cowboys doesn’t deserve a prize. Picking the Cardinals on the road on the other hand? That takes something. Call it courage, call it foresight, call it an incredible distrust in the Unibrow, but Kraft took Kevin Kolb on the road against one of the best defenses in the NFL. I don’t think Kraft envisioned Arizona’s first half explosion, but he was right about the Ravens’ offense being terrible–at least for a while. By the time Baltimore woke up, they were just trying to scrape out an ugly win. A double-digit cover was a pipe dream.
The “I Was Brushing Snow Off My Car in October,” Awful Pick of the Week: One of my favorite things to do with this section is highlight people who talk themselves into the wrong pick. We’ve been doing this for three years now. It’s not like we don’t pay attention to football, or don’t notice certain recurring themes. Take me for example, a few weeks back I went against the Saints on the road as big favorites (win). The Saints haven’t been a reliable road cover against bad teams in well over a year. They are terribly inconsistent, and on the road often look like a 6-10 team . I know this, but they score 84 points against the Colts one week and it wipes my mind clear. I say, normally I don’t like the Saints on the road, but…NO BUT! You don’t like the Saints on the road! That’s it. The reason you don’t is because they do things like lose to St. Louis.
D.A. Standings and Summaries:
The good news is, Tim Tebow is going to continue to start. The bad news is, there was no way we could match the magic of last week. In a more general sense, the teams that fell to 3-5 need to start thinking about a rally here. There are only 4 playoff spots and we’re down to six weeks left. More than one more loss, and you could be looking at a high draft pick in week one next year.
- Neckbeards and Codeine: 6-2
- JCK: 5-3
- Kraft: 4-4
- Fake Chow: 4-4
- Team Horse Face: 4-4
- The Shiva Cry: 3-5
- The Slop Jocks: 3-5
- Eli Esses D: 3-5
Team Horse Face Ends Losing Streak with 54.75 to 20 Win over The Slop Jocks.
I don’t keep track of such things, but I have a feeling that Blaine Gabbert, from the time he took over the Jaguars to the end of the year, will be the highest D.A. scorer per week. There’s almost no danger in taking him. The Jags don’t throw enough for him to pile up yardage, he’s got no receivers and he’s just not that good. He racked up another 35.75 points this week and helped DC end a long drought. The Slop Jocks lost at chance to win a shootout with Alex Smith’s (-1 point) effort. I think Philip Rivers might be replacing Smith on some draft lists in week 9.
Neckbeards and Codeine Roll On with 23.5 to 13 Win over Eli Esses D.
Eli Esses D isn’t out of it yet, but they’ll certainly need a win in week nine. Their modest winning streak came to an end at the hands of the regular season leader. For Dub, Matt Hasselbeck was just too good a quarterback on Sunday (-8 points) to make a serious run. Neckbeards relied heavily on the 2nd half performance of Kevin Kolb. His inaccuracy and his ability to stay out of Arizona’s 1st half surge allowed him to put up 26 points in a close loss. The outcome highlights the importance of losing the game. If the Cards had pulled this one out, it would have been a much closer game.
Kraft Erupts for a Convincing 68 to 8.25 win over The Shiva Cry.
BK is never afraid to roll the dice. When I saw him take Ben Roethlisberger with his 2nd pick I was a little surprised, but I guess he thought with John Beck (33 points) on his side, he could afford to take a risk. He needed a big score, but Big Ben was not the answer. He picked apart New England’s secondary for too many yards. Kraft dubbed Tim Tebow, “The Right Leg of God,” this week and he was certainly heavenly in D.A. terms. The guy can’t execute basic tasks that you need to do as a quarterback. His Broncos teammates don’t do him any favors, either. Tebow’s massive 50 point total was the only bullet Kraft needed on Sunday.
Fake Chow Ends JCK’s Winnings Streak in a 19.25 to 12 Nail-Biter.
This one came down to Monday night. For much of the game, it looked like Matt Cassel was not going to deliver the goods for Fake Chow, but in the 2nd half his incompletions piled up, and he mixed in a couple of interceptions. He was well in the clear. Then the game goes to OT and Cassel ventures into penalty yardage, but not far enough. There were no stand-out efforts in this game, and JCK’s team of Ponder/Feeley didn’t live up to the hype or expectations. Not nearly enough turnovers, and Feeley pulled off the improbably upset against the Saints with 31 points. That’s a 10-point swing. JCK remains in 2nd place overall, but he’ll have to start a new winning streak next week.
3-PT D.A. of the Week:
Giving this to Tebow almost feels like kicking him while he’s down, but I have no choice. First he put up 50 points, but also I don’t want to lose perspective on how bad he is just because he’s bad every week. Yeah, Charlie Whitehurst stunk and got benched and Gabbert and Kolb were their usual selves, but Tebow just kicks it all up to another level. If he hadn’t had a couple of good drives late against the Dolphins, this would be two weeks running for the Gator. I have to wonder, is Kyle Orton really this bad, and is John Fox sorry he took the job? I know there are only 32 spots available, and it’s hard to turn one down, but now he’s out of the Luck race and committed to Tebow for another week. Yikes. P.S., Brady Quinn must be powerful bad.