Spring Forward.

Give Me "The Human Highlight Reel" Steve Stricker at 16:1.

I’m ready to change the clocks.  If it’s going to be 70 degrees, what the hell, right?  So we lose an hour this weekend.  I have that  memorized now.  I think last year I was going in the wrong direction–so often the case.  Since we have to pack the entire weekend into 47 hours, it’s important you know exactly what is going on.  Time wasted will only put you further behind schedule. In arbitrary of order of significance…

Selection Sunday:  

At about 7pm on Sunday you have half the world’s population running to check if they have ink in their printer.  Spoiler alert–I never do.  In fact, the last time my printer ran out of ink, I just left it sitting there like an old console television.  I prefer to fill out my bracket the old fashion way–in the USA Today.  Anyway, there’s no other sport that gets a boost in interest like NCAA basketball for a specific event.  I think it even trumps the Super Bowl.  Pools > Super Bowl Ads.  Like I said last week I’ve never been less informed about a college basketball season.  This means my confidence in my pool will be sky-high.  There’s some serious chalk out there this year:  Kentucky, North Carolina, Syracuse and I’m predicting total chaos leading up to a high-profile championship game.  No Butler.

Harvard is in the field this year for the first time since 1946.  Another school that excuses its poor basketball record by flaunting academics, Northwestern, has never gotten in and appears to have blown their latest and best shot.  Aside from Duke, the schools for “smart kids” always get covered differently in the tournament.  Stereotypes are hard to shake.  Of course, stereotypes exist for a reason in some cases.  The Harvard reaction to their recent hardwood success has been SO HARVARD.

 “We’re not Duke, and don’t want to be,” said Peter Sampson, an alumnus from Los Angeles who was visiting the campus to attend a research seminar. “We’re proud of the basketball team, and if they’re going to play they might as well be good. But we’re also proud of everyone. Tomorrow it might be the time to notice a new groundbreaking book by a professor or a scientific discovery. A basketball game is fleeting.”

I’ll be throwing up a pool for those of you that are interested.  We play for the highest stakes around here.  Pride.  Does anyone remember who won last year?  I don’t, but I’m going to send out a little invite to everyone who played last year, so man your inbox.  As always, there are no rules on number of entries, and no rules in general, except that if you are going to be offensive with your team name, it better be funny.  I’ll post the link to join the bracket starting next week.  In the meantime, study up.

***

Phillies/Tigers today from beautiful Lakeland.  What’s my biggest non-health related concern of Spring Training so far?  Laynce Nix.  I’m pretty sure the guy does not have a hit.  He might want to bless his bats with a chicken bone cross at some point.  Part of the problem is, Nix is facing some left-handed pitching and Roy Halladay hits lefties better than Laynce Nix.  I’m not too sure about this guy.  Other observations…

  1. The Phillies get an incredible amount of breaking balls thrown to them–even in Spring Training.  3-1 curve ball?  Why not?
  2. Scott Podsednik and Ty Wigginton are looking a lot better than Laynce Nix
  3. Dontrelle Willis–have you thought about playing in Mexico?
  4. If Dom Brown played outfield like Lou Montanez–we’d be set.
  5. Papelbon is growing on me.

***

The PGA Tour is at Doral this weekend for the Cadillac World Golf…something.  It’s a no-cut, limited field event that usually guarantees a “good” leaderboard.  Rory McIlroy shot 73 yesterday, and Tiger shot 72–both well off the pace.  Cancel the rivalry.  Of course, it’s “understandable” that Rory is having a bit of a letdown.  Who can possibly play well three weeks in a row?  Take some time to regroup, Rors, you’ve already won this year’s Masters.  As you see above I’m taking a blind stab at Steve Stricker. He looked like he was going to shoot about 62 yesterday, but the high winds eventually caught up to most of the players.  Adam Scott and Jason Dufner share the 1st round lead.   Should be a wild, and wide-open weekend.

Doral also in the news because it was purchased by Donald Trump.  I was at Doral a few years ago and it’s a nice place, but like  many of the Florida resorts it feels like it’s from a different time.  You go to Innisbrook and the course is immaculate, but the condos there are 80s sit-com chic.  So, I think golfers are always headed to the newer, more shiny resort and that puts places like Doral in peril.  That and the fact that fewer people are playing golf.  Trump is coming in with stacks of cash to revitalize the place and hopefully he pulls it off.  He’s got Gil Hanse (recently awarded the 2016 Olympic design) on board to redo Doral’s Blue Course for the millionth time.  Hanse, of course, is Malvern, PA’s most famous golf architect.  I’m sure everyone over at Applebrook is thrilled with Gil’s recent successes.  Too bad they never mention East Goshen’s finest among his top works.

***

I guess there’s a chance Pey-Pey could sign this weekend.  He’s not going to waste any time, according to Shefty.  That makes sense.  Peyton needs to start looking at some damn film.  Offensive coordinators may have to be fired.  It’s a process.  Sounds like Peyton is anti-NFC East, which puts a damper on the burgeoning tide of sentiment for him to join the Eagles.  Like a pitcher afraid of facing of facing the DH, Peyton sounds like he wants to stick with the AFC.  Does that mean Miami actually has a shot?  Not Seattle? Or Arizona?  Dolphins if you’re greedy, Tennessee if you’re nostalgic–and vindictive.

***

Ok, I think that’s it for the week.  Enjoy the weekend, go see Riggins in John Carter (just kidding–looks awful), good luck with your brackets, see everyone round ’bout Monday.

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2 thoughts on “Spring Forward.

  1. puke…that is so harvard. they feel the same about the performing arts, despite having an annual weekend to celebrate them. one weekend a year to celebrate natalie portman. fleeting.

    Emily Q Turnbell ’01

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