D.A. Fantasy Football — Week 10

You Again.

There is an elite group of D.A. quarterbacks forming.  It might not be the best year for terrible QB play, but a handful of guys are doing their part on a consistent basis.  At the top of this heap of suck is a duo that demands recognition.  Christian Ponder and whoever suits up for the Chiefs are waging war right now–week in, and week out.  What Brady Quinn does one week, Christian Ponder tries to top the next.  It’s like Frazier/Ali.  Just below these characters is a category of D.A. I think needs to be examined if we go forward for a 2013 season.  If anyone saw Carson Palmer play on Sunday you know it was a brutal performance.  He flailed.  He quit.  He went up in flames.  But, because of 414 yards, it was a terrible D.A. day.  This doesn’t seem fair.  So, I’d propose this rule change:

For Penalty Yards it starts at the following:

200 yds for 0 INTs

250 yds for 1 INT

275 yds for 2 INT

300 yds for 3 INT

350 yds for 4 INT

And, any QB who can pop for 5+ INTs gets no penalty yards.

3-PT D.A of the Week:  Christian Ponder.  

I believe Ponder is our 1st two time winner of 2012.  How doomed is this relationship with Sam Steele?  I think the shelf life is another week or two–tops.  If they actually ever saw each other, I’m fairly sure they’d be broken up.  As I said, this was a two man race.  Matt Cassel vs. Ponder.  Chiefs vs. Vikings.  It’s becoming a pattern.  Matt Cassel fumble-sixed and threw a pick-6 on consecutive possessions.  Shocking stuff.  Ponder was once again horrific while barely being allowed to throw the ball.  In the end, I have to lean toward Ponder’s 63 passing yards.  How does this happen in the modern NFL?  In a game where he was trailing most of the last 3 quarters, he throws for 63 yards?  That’s uncanny D.A. ability.  Does anyone even know who is backing Ponder up in Minnesota?  We might find out soon.

D.A. Standings: 

  1. Shiva Cry, 7-2
  2. Team Horse Face, 6-3
  3. Fake Chow, 6-3
  4. Eli Esses D, 4-5
  5. Doubleback Vineyards, 4-5
  6. Happy Valley Tickle Monsters, 4-5
  7. Neckbeards and Codeine, 3-6
  8. Kraft, 2-7

Week Nine Quick Summaries:

Horse Face Clips Eli Esses D, 34.25 to  27.  

Highlights:  Horse Face continues to wait for Shiva’s slip up in pursuit of the #1 seed.  This week he rode D.A. award winner, Christian Ponder (36.25 points) to the win.  Matt Cassel was terrible for Big Dub, but his stink was concentrated on those two awful plays.  Not quite enough.

Fake Chow Continues Kraft’s Nightmare Season, (.2.25) to (41)

Highlights:  Kraft hasn’t caught a break all year.  Here his opponent scores in the negative and he lands on Andrew Luck’s billion passing yards.  For Fake Chow, John “Helter” Skelton was the leading scorer in this matchup with 18 points.  Just another day for Skelly.

Happy Valley Tickle Monsters beats Neckbeards and Codeine, 6 to (7)

Highlights:  The Brandon Weeden show for HVTM.  Weeden is trying to creep into that elite D.A. conversation.  He seems to be getting less accurate–which is great.  His 33 points were 2nd only to Ponder’s effort this week.  It was more than enough to beat Neckbeards who were led by Gabbert’s five points.

Doubleback Vineyards Climbs into Playoff Hunt with 24-14 Win over Shiva Cry

Highlights:  Thank you Matt Hasselbeck.  It’s been a real learning process playing D.A. and after a slow start I find myself sniffing respectability.  I owe the Bears who coaxed 23 points out of the bald one and it was enough for a win.  For Shiva, Houston’s vaunted defense didn’t come through as Fitzy could only manage an unlucky 11 points.

Week 10 Draft Order:

  1. Gross
  2. Nichols
  3. DC
  4. JCK
  5. Brian
  6. Kraft
  7. Will
  8. BK

Week 10 Games:

  1. Eli Esses D. vs. Shiva Cry
  2. Happy Valley Tickle Monsters vs. Kraft
  3. Fake Chow vs. Doubleback Vineyards
  4. Team Horse Face vs. Neckbeards and Codeine
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