Week Two NFL Picks

Brought to You By Deschutes Brewery*

Brought to You By Deschutes Brewery*

*Not Really.

If last night’s game was any indication, week two of the NFL season might not be quite as exciting as the opening week. Either that, or the Patriots finally ran out of receivers.  Here in Philadelphia, a return to Earth for the Eagles offense will not be accepted.  I said before the season that the Philadelphia fan base wasn’t going to accept a losing season with a happy-go-lucky eye toward the future.  And, my theory was actually proven with an Eagles win in week one.  I feel a collective sigh of relief from the fan base.  “Thank god, I don’t have to pretend to tolerate a six or seven win season.”  Now that the Eagles breezed by Washington (for the most part) in week one, the fans can more realistically target the division.  A few more wins and look out…

Week Two Beer:  Mirror Pond Pale Ale from Deschutes Brewery.  

Deschutes is located on the Deschutes river in Bend, Oregon.  Back in the nineties there was a Minor League team in town, aptly named the Bend Rockies.  I had a Bend Rockies hat.  It looked exactly like a Colorado Rockies hat, except that there was a “B” in place of the “C.”  This is when “low-profile” hats were the flat-bills of the time and for someone with a big head it was a nightmare finding a hat that fit.  The Bend Rockies hat fit me perfectly.  And, I wore it constantly.  For years.  Through college, after it had faded to a color that matched NOTHING, and after about 3 surgeries on the adjustable strap to keep it together.  Eventually the “BR” hat finally had to go, but when I saw a beer from Bend, Oregon–I couldn’t resist.  

Unfortunately, the beer didn’t quite live up to its scenic hometown.  It looked incredible, but there wasn’t enough flavor for me.  Not hoppy enough?  I don’t really know what that means.  It’s a perfectly fine beer, but the kind you don’t really remember what it tastes like a few minutes after you’ve had one.  

Am I Sorry I didn’t Get Sierra–A LITTLE BIT, but a trip to the brewery and the area seems like it would be a good time.

***

NFL Pick ‘EM Standings:

  1. Big Dub, 4-2
  2. Grossy, 3-2
  3. Kraft, 2-2-1
  4. DC, 1-3-1
  5. JCK, 1-5
  6. Nichols, 0-5

***

Big Dub: 

Miami (+2.5) over Indianapolis:  I’m convinced the Colts stink. Until they blowout the Dolphins, of course.

Kansas City (-3) over Dallas:  It just feels right.  Andy has to beat Dallas.  

Denver (-4.5) over New York Giants:  Going to ride horse face until he doesn’t cover.  

Cincinnati (-7) over Pittsburgh:  Keep trotting out that o-line and running game and I’ll keep betting against the Steelers.  

***

Kraft:  

Philadelphia (-7.5) over San Diego.  It’s been hard to be an Eagles fan the past 2 years, but along comes the mad scientist and I’m all on board now. San Diego has zero heart. The team that lost all those big leads last year, has a new coach and starts off this year losing a 28-7 lead at home? And I’m going to take them on the road against a rejuvenated Eagles team? Please. The only thing SD has are sick powder blue unis. 

Atlanta (-6.5) over St. Louis.  No way ATL starts off 0-2. Matty Ice is like 90-4 at home and the only way Georgia Frontiere covers is with Jim Everett behind center…by the way, Jeff fisher in 16 years as a head coach, only has 6 winning seasons (courtesy of b Simmons). That’s staggering for a highly regarded coach…how many winning seasons has ray Rhodes had? Richie kotite?

Miami (+2.5) over Indianapolis.  Indy wins all these close games and I think you cannot keep testing fate. The dolphins go to 2-0, and somewhere Joe Robbie pours a glass of champagne.

Dallas (+3) over Kansas City.  Why?  Because you can’t play Jacksonville every week.  

Seattle (-3) over San Francisco.  The ‘she-hawks’ match up great vs SF- they shut down Kaepernick and Chris Warren runs all day.

***

Grossy:

Carolina (-3) over Buffalo.  The Panthers defense was one of the most impressive things to emerge from week one in my opinion.  If they can shut down Seattle’s attack, they should be able to shut down the Freshman version of it they run in Buffalo.  The Bills still stink, except now they have a QB who went to Florida State instead of Harvard.  But, FSU is the Harvard of Tallahassee.  Cam bounces back, or at least he better for the sake of my fantasy team. 

Atlanta (-6.5) over St. Louis.  I think there are some honest chances for blowouts on the board this week, and here is one of them.  Badly needing a win, home opener, it all lines up for Atlanta–just like it didn’t line up last week.  At the Home Dome, everything will be different for the boys.  Julio Jones shows Tavon Austin and the Rams what a real 1st round WR looks like, Jered Cook falls off 32 TD pace and the Falcons roll.  

Oakland (-5.5) over Jacksonville.  The Raiders shouldn’t be favored against anyone.  Not at home.  Not on the road.  Not scrimmaging the Toronto Argonauts.  Then again, the Jags probably couldn’t hang in the CFL.  Or the Patriot League.  I haven’t seen an offense this bad since F&M circa ’99.  This is Terrelle Pryor’s coming out party–as a fantasy QB.  I’m seeing 27-11.  

Denver (-4.5) over New York Giants.  If there is less than 850 yards passing in this game I will be surprised.  Eli’s got the receivers to keep up, but he’s also more prone to the pick, has no running game, and the Giants defense is a disaster area (see week 1).  I think Peyton is going to motivated by several things this year, the most important of which might be trying to nose past Tom Brady in the all-important “Legacy” category.  With the Pats depleted, I’m sure Pey-Pey sees blood in the water.  

Cincinnati (-7) over Pittsburgh.  Here’s another one that could be a blowout.  Pittsburgh is terrible, they have no recourse to get better and the Bengals absolutely need this game.  Who’s covering AJ Green?  Which four guys?  I think the Bungles take a rare chance and rub this one in–with flair.  The Red Rifle is ready to aim and fire.  

***

DC:

Atlanta (-6.5) over St. Louis.  Oh my goodness.  ATL 42 STL 13

Green Bay (-7.5) over Washington.  Washington is coming off a short week and I don’t think Green Bay is the soft warm cozy blanket that the WSH defense needs to sleep quietly thorugh the night.

Dallas (+3) over Kansas City.  Andy Reid goes missing at halftime on account of some strategically-placed barbeque

New Orleans (-3.5) over Tampa Bay.  Greg Schiano’s pants are going to feel a little toasty after this one.

Carolina (-3) over Buffalo.  Maybe getting nosed out by New England wasn’t as impressive of a start for Buffalo as we thought? 

***

Nichols:

Indianapolis (-2.5) over Miami.  Miami is shooting for .500 this season.  Why not achieve your goals in week 2?

Atlanta (-6.5) over St. Louis.  Matt Ryan (I’m dropping Matty Ice – it’s disrespectful to Natty Ice) is at home and ATL has a lot to prove after last season.  This is a game they can dominate on both sides of the ball.

Green Bay (-7.5) over Washington.   Aaron Rodgers doesn’t lose two weeks in a row. 

Kansas City (-3) over Dallas.  Yes, I’m a Giants fan, but anyone can see that winning by 5 in a game that you were on the receiving end of 6 turnovers is pretty pathetic.  I’m not sold on Dallas, and I think KC is the team to keep them in check.

Cincinnati (-7) over Pittsburgh.  Steelers are horrible, and someone in the AFC North has to win this week.

 

 

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8 thoughts on “Week Two NFL Picks

  1. Just a heads up- sources are reporting that Yahoo sports is going to break a big story on Monday that F&M basketball players from 2000-2009 received impermissible benefits such as no cover charges at Doc Hollidays and Hildys, and free pizzas from Metro Pizza. Scandalous

  2. Haha. That was allowed, because G-Rob only gave you $4 to eat on road trips.

    And, speaking of Andy Reid and bbq, it doesn’t appear that he lost his off-season weight this year. For as long as I can remember the big guy took off about thirty before throwing on 50 during the season. Looks like he skipped a step this year. BIG RED.

  3. Washington 2013: ‘operation winless’ aha aha….cris carter on the pre game show talked about how daunte culpepper was never the same after a bad knee injury…he is going to get disciplined by ESPN because they clearly are all-in on RG3.
    I hate the bears. I think I’m 2-46 against the spread with he bears in the past 3 years…there is no way Minnesota should cover that game.

  4. That sucks…I was already preparing lines for next week to reference Jax averaging 2.5 pts per game. Their offense is beyond disgusting. When you avg 6 pts per game you cannot list Denard Robinson as a ‘weapon’. You have no weapons period

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