I’m tired of football analysis. I don’t mean talking about the sport in general, I’m talking about people trying to get in-depth. Honestly, I never want to hear the term “read-option” again in my life. It doesn’t matter to me. I don’t care what Chip Kelly’s true offense is, I don’t want to talk about the difference between a quarterback who can run and a running quarterback. I’m not an offensive coordinator. I have no desire to be one, or to watch the ALL-22 film, or whatever that horsebleep is called. If you want to break down offensive line blocking schemes, maybe you are a better fan than I am, but you are certainly a different kind of fan. You know what interests me? Results. Call the offense whatever you want, play who you want, draft who you want–just stop screwing it up. Win some games. That’s all I care about.
Week Seven Beer: Bear Republic Racer 5 IPA
Here’s a comment pulled from a Racer 5 IPA review, “Mouthfeel is on the thin side of medium. Small carbonation fills it up nicely.” Are you kidding me? I thought the mouthfeel was on the fat side of small. I made that mini-rant on football above to relate it to beer reviews. I don’t want to get obsessive about any of these things. IS THE BEER GOOD TO DRINK? Racer 5, in my non-mouthfeel opinion, is a really good IPA. It’s a bit stronger (7% ABV) than some, but has everything I’m looking for when trying a new IPA. Is this what I was hoping it would taste like–yes. That is all. For a California beer that gets some solid reviews, it’s readily available on the east coast. Hooray distribution.
Am I sorry I didn’t get Sierra: No. Racer 5 has a bit too much alcohol to replace Sierra as a go-to beer, but the taste is quite similar in my opinion. I like to crush the occasional Racer 5 when I see it on tap, makes it feel like a special occasion.
Rankings So Far:
- Heady Topper Double IPA
- Bear Republic Racer 5 IPA
- Shed IPA
- Bell’s Midwestern Pale Ale
- Anderson Valley Hop Ottin’ IPA
- Deschutes Brewery IPA
- Sierra Nevada Flipside Red IPA
Can I have the winners please…
Big Dub, Record: 19-11-1*–All sucker lines this week.
- New England (-4) over NYJ. Geno Smith Blows
- Chicago (+1) over Washington. RG3 Blows.
- New York Giants (-3.5) over Minnesota. Josh Freeman blows.
- San Diego (-7.5) over Jacksonville. Entire organization blows.
*Had Seattle Thursday Night.
JCK, Record: 14-16-1*
- Patriots (-4) over New York Jets
- Detroit (-3) over Cincinnati
- San Francisco (-4.5) over Tennessee
- Denver (-6.5) over Indianapolis
*Also had Seattle.
DC, Record: 14-14-2
Chicago (+1) over Washington. Has there been a proposal for what we’re going to call the Washington Football Senators when they are no longer the Redskins? Chicago, 22-18.
Green Bay (-10) over Cleveland. Brandon Weedon and Willis McGahee. Green Bay, 31-9
Baltimore (+2) over Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh beat the Jets and now they’re laying points to the Ravens?
New York Giants (-3.5) over Minnesota. Las Vegas sees Josh Freeman and gives the Vikings an extra half-point.
Tennessee (+4.5) over San Francisco. Just feels like a bad spot for the Niners. I know that doesn’t make any kind of analytical sense.
Kansas City (-6.5) over Houston. So, Case Keenum. Or is it Kase Ceenum? Does it matter against KC’s defense. It’s going to be another horrific bloodbath. And, while KC’s offense is no prize, there is a reasonably good chance that Houston has given up on the season. See performance against Bradford, Sam. Looks awfully easy, but again Case Keenum.
Cincinnati (+3) over Detroit. I keep going to the Bengals–not sure why. Detroit is still a team for me that should never give points. It was fashionable to pick them to lose last week against Cleveland–so why not here? In the Buckle Bowl, it’s best to always take the Lions. Still unsure about Mega’s health and I like Cincy’s defense a bit more.
Buffalo (+8) over Miami. The Dolphins are laying eight points now? It appears that Thad Lewis, no relation to Chad Lewis, is a competent enough QB to cover spreads. Meaning, he’s no Case Keenum. But, really, I just can’t imagine a scenario where the Dolphins are giving eight points. Half a spite pick, because I still am upset with the Dolphins.
Dallas (+3) over Philadelphia. The Eagles have beaten the Giants (0-6), the Bucs (0-5) and the Redskins (1-4). It’s not like Dallas has distinguished wins either, but I’m just trying to put into perspective the Birds as a .500 team. It’s kind of like when the Astros were .500 this season when they were 1-1. Not terribly indicative of what they were as a ballclub. This is essentially the Chargers game again for me, the Eagles lose some type of “shootout.”
Baltimore (+2.5) over Pittsburgh. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Just stop it with the Steelers, OK. They are going to get killed. I don’t care about rivalries.
Kraft, Record: 20-9-1
Chicago (+1) over Washington. Washington’s D is porous. Cutler has a field day. Operation .500 looks like a best case scenario for these skins.
San Francisco (-4.5) over Tennesee. San Francisco has their groove back and Tennessee still has Fitzy behind center. Infinity x Infinity. Boom!!!
Baltimore (+2) over Pittsburgh. Yawn.
New York Giants (-3.5) over Minnesota. The schneid ends in week 7. Jared Lorenzen comes off the bench and leads Big Blue to a seven point win over the punchless Vikings.
Kansas City (-6.5) over Houston. Case Keenum? Check please.
Nichols, Record: Record, 14-16
- New England (-4) over New York Jets
- Buffalo (+8) over Miami
- Chicago (+1) over Washington
- St. Louis (+6) over Carolina
- San Francisco (-4.5) over Tennesee